Shinobi or Pirate or just plain Confused
by Foxsword
Summary: Naruto's team goes through a portal into the world of the Straw Hat crew. Mostly humor, adventure, and more humor. Storyline is still being thought up.
1. Chapter 1

1. Pirates!

"Hey, look!" Naruto yelled to the rest of his team. "I've never seen a ship like that at the docks before." He pointed to a strange ship docked to the pier. It definitely wasn't one of those small fishing types. Its figurehead was that of a ram, and it seemed to have a huge bush growing out of the center of its deck.

"Of course you haven't," Sasuke said. "Ships come in and out of these docks all the time. You can't expect to know every single one of them.

"I agree with Sasuke-kun," concurred Sakura.

"That's what you think, smarty-pants! I've seen and explored every ship that has entered these docks, and I intend to keep that up. I'm goin' aboard."

"Oh no, you won't!" interrupted Kakashi. "Remember what happened the last time you ran off? You got us all in trouble."

There was no answer. Naruto was already speeding off in the direction of the ship. Kakashi sighed and started to run after him. Sasuke and Sakura followed more slowly. Naruto climbed up the ladder hanging over the side of the ship with the others close on his heels. When Sasuke got there he stopped suddenly, causing Sakura to almost crash into him.

"What is it?" she asked, a little irritated.

Sasuke muttered, "Something's not right about this ship," but he started climbing up the ladder anyway, with Sakura in his wake.

Just as the last of Team 7 got on board, a gust of wind caught the sails and the ship lurched forward. Everyone, surprised by the sudden jolt, tripped and hit the deck. Naruto looked back to see if he could jump off and gasped in surprise.

The dock wasn't there. It had been replaced by a carpet of dark blue sea. There was no land in sight. The others heard him and looked too. Sakura was so surprised that she fell over again. Everyone stared at the vast expanse of sky and water in shock.

"We must have walked through a portal," Sasuke said half-disbelievingly.

"But portals don't really exist, except in stories," Naruto countered.

"Well, this kinda is a story, you know."

"Waddya mean 'it kinda is a story?'"

The two were so caught up in the argument, that they didn't pay attention to Sakura when she screamed. Kakashi turned around, saw what she was scared of, and immediately aimed a kunai at the person. There was a whirl of blades, and the small weapon fell harmlessly to the floor. The others turned around at the noise and gaped at the guy. Kakashi stared at the person in surprise.

He was tall, wore a black bandana around his head, and held a sword in either hand, with another one's handle clamped between his teeth. He stared right back at the jonin.

The staring contest ended when a black-haired kid wearing a straw hat and a scar under his left eye came from behind the swordsman and punched Kakashi in the gut. He fell back, more in shock than pain. _The kid had just stretched his arm to over twice its normal length!!!_

"Luffy!" rebuked the swordsman. "You didn't have to do that."

"Well, he was attacking you," Luffy retorted.

"He was being on his guard. It's called defending yourself, dope-head."

Naruto, thinking they were enemies, shouted out a challenge. "Hey, stretchy kid, I dare you to fight against me!"

Sakura bonked him on the head. "Baka, didn't you hear what they were saying? They're probably surprised that we were on their ship in the first place."

"Who are you?" the swordsman asked, pointing to Kakashi. "And who's that quiet kid?"

"I'm Hatake Kakashi. And that's…"

"It's common courtesy to say your own name before requesting another's," Sasuke interrupted. "Anyhow, I'm Uchiha Sasuke."

"Roronoa Zoro," the swordsman replied. He sheathed his swords and took off his bandana, revealing a shock of green hair.

"Hey, I bet you're dying to know what my name is, right?" Naruto asked, a little jealous of Sasuke.

"Well, I'm interested!" answered the rubber kid. "My name's Luffy, what's yours?"

"Naruto. I'm a ninja."

"Cool! I've never met one before. It must be really fun being a ninja. Almost as fun as being a pirate."

All of a sudden, there was silence, only broken by the crying of gulls.

Luffy scratched his head. "Was it something I said?"

Sakura, who had finally gotten over her initial shock, replied, "Y-you guys are pirates?"

"Sure are!" Big smile from Luffy. "I'm the captain."

"Where is the rest of your crew?" Sasuke asked challengingly.

"They're below deck," Zoro offered. "Do you want to go meet them?"

They walked down the stairs into a room, apparently the lounge room, because four people were sitting by a table playing Go Fish. They all looked up at the new arrivals.

They were teens; a girl, two guys, and one strange reindeer-like creature. They didn't look at all like pirates.

"Guess what?" Luffy said. "We found four ninja! These are Naruto, Sasuke, Kakashi, and I forgot the pink-haired girl's name."

"It's Sakura."

"Whatever. Anyway, they were on our ship because… wait, how did you get on our ship?"

Sakura, seeing a chance to get back at Naruto for getting them all into this, said, "Well, you see, Naruto here decided to sneak aboard your ship. The rest of us were following –"

"Wait a second," the girl, a spunky, orange-haired teen, interrupted. "There's nothing but ocean for miles around. What docks are you talking about?"

"We must have walked through a portal. That would explain why I felt so weird when we started up the ladder." Sasuke said. Before Naruto could argue, he added, "By the way, who are you guys?"

"I'm Nami," she said. "And these are Sanji, Ussop, and Chopper." She pointed to each of them in turn.

"Hey, Sanji, it's your turn," said Ussop. He looked something like a teenage Pinocchio, with the long nose and eyes that looked like they were painted on his face.

"All right, all right," Sanji replied. "Got any twos?" His yellow hair covered one of his eyes, and smoke was coming up from the cigarette in his mouth. Sakura noticed that he looked at Nami, well, _differently_ than the others.

"Are you asking me?" asked Chopper. He looked something like an overly fat baby reindeer (sorry to those of you who like Chopper), and he wore a big red hat with a white X in the middle.

"Yes, I'm asking you."

"Yeah. sigh"

"Yes!" Sanji jumped up. "Game over. Let's count the pairs."

"It's obvious," Sakura interrupted. "Nami won. Look at the pile of pairs she has. It's larger than any of yours."

"Nami! You're so good at this game!" Sanji said with obvious love in his eyes.

"Yeah! I win!" Nami shouted. "Come on," she said to Sakura. "Let's go to my cabin and talk. It'll be nice to talk to another girl for a change, instead of all these guys."

"Hey, Naruto!" Luffy offered. "I'll show you around the ship."

"Sure!"

Sanji went out of the room to make lunch, and Ussop went to get some 'target practice' with his slingshot. Sasuke said, "I'm going back to the deck to get some fresh air and figure out how to get back home."

"Can I go too?" asked Chopper.

Sasuke stared at him for a moment, then said, "Stay out of my way…weakling." Then he walked off.

"Fine!" Chopper stomped out. Soon, there was no one in the room except for Zolo and Kakashi.

Uncomfortable silence between them.

"So, uh," Zolo shifted position. "What's it like, being a ninja?"

"Oh, it's cool. You learn how to walk up trees without using your arms, use kunai…"

"Whoa, back up. Climb trees without using your hands? That's impossible."

"No, it isn't. Come on, I'll show you. Would Luffy mind if I used the mast for a tree?"

"I don't think so."

5/21/2007


	2. Chapter 2

"So, you're the only girl in this crew?" Sakura asked. "How do you keep yourself occupied?"

They were sitting on hammocks in Nami's cabin. It was supposed to be for all the girls, but, since she was the only one, she had it all to herself.

"I draw maps, help navigate dangerous water … that kind of stuff."

"You're the ship's navigator?"

"Yup. My dream is to make a map of the whole world. Actually, I used to be a thief, specializing in stealing from pirates."

"But you work _for_ pirates now."

"These people aren't like other pirates. They don't rob innocent people."

"Oh."

"I also pick tangerines in my spare time."

"How do you pick tangerines when you're on a ship?"

"I have a tangerine grove. Wanna go see it?"

"Okay."

"…and that's the place where I like to sit, right there on the prow," Luffy pointed.

"Hey, can I try?" asked Naruto.

"Sure, go ahead. Be careful you don't fall."

"Oh, I won't fall." He climbed up to the top of the "ram's head" and sat there. "Wow, this is cool! You can see for miles around here."

"Hey, Naruto!" It was Sakura, sitting on top of the "giant bush" which was actually the tangerine grove.

"What the- Aaaaahhhh!!!" Naruto slipped, fell, and plunged downwards toward the ocean.

"Hold on!" Luffy yelled. "Gum-gum net!" Naruto suddenly found himself in a rubbery net that was springing back up to the ship. When he was able to see the deck, he couldn't believe his eyes.

Luffy had made the net by stretching and interlacing his fingers, and then he had stretched his arm down to catch Naruto with it. As soon as Naruto was safe on the deck, the net became once again an arm and fingers.

"Th-thanks for the save!" Naruto gasped. "I-I thought I was a goner!"

"No problem. I needed a little practice with that technique anyway."

"How do you do that? I mean, all this stretching stuff."

"I ate a Gum-gum, one of the devil fruits. They can make you do lots of cool things if you eat one, but if you do, you won't be able to swim. Mine allows me to stretch."

"Oh."

"Hey, Naruto!" It was Kakashi, standing upside-down underneath the crow's nest. "Be more careful next time!"

"Cool!" Luffy said, noticing the ninja defy gravity. "Let me try." Before anyone could protest, he gave himself a running start, ran three feet up the mast, and crash-landed back on deck.

"Hey!" Naruto yelled anxiously. "Are you alright?"

"He's rubber," Zolo said. "Nothing can hurt him except something sharp. Watch." He picked a tangerine off one of the trees in the grove and threw it hard at Luffy. Speeding like a bullet, it seemed that if Luffy didn't dodge it quick, he would have one monster bruise. The tangerine hit him straight in the chest. But since he was rubber, his chest caved inwards a little, then sprung it right back in the direction it came from. Zolo reached up, caught it, and handed it to Nami.

"It may not have bruised him, but it sure bruised itself!" she said, looking at the half- squashed tangerine in distaste.

Sasuke sat on the deck alone, thinking. _What a mess this has turned out to be. Now how am I supposed to meet up with Orochimaru-sama? _He rubbed the curse seal on his neck. _I really need that power, but…that means that I'll be abandoning the team. _

His thoughts were interrupted when heard a yell. _That sounds like Naruto!_ Sasuke ran down the deck towards the noise.

"Yummy! Chow time!" Naruto licked his lips at the sight of the food Sanji had prepared for lunch.

"Baka! You almost got me scared for you!" Sasuke said, inwardly relieved that Naruto was alright. _Great! Just great!_ he thought_. Now I've proved that I care too much for the team to abandon them._

"Come on already! Let's eat!" Luffy said.

5/21/2007


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Two

After lunch, Sasuke decided to go up to the crow's nest to think. It would be above the noise of the others on deck, and he would be alone. He walked up the mast and climbed into the crow's nest. _Are we ever going to get back home?_ He wondered.

All of a sudden, he saw something white on the horizon. It quickly grew into a sail, which was attached to a ship. "Hey!" Sasuke yelled down to the others. "There's a ship out there, and it's coming this way! We'll make contact in about five minutes!"

"A ship?" asked Luffy. "Where?"

"It's on the right side of this ship!"

"That's the starboard," Nami interrupted.

"Whatever."

"What does the flag look like?" Luffy wanted to know.

"Skull and crossbones, I think. But what's with the big red nose on it?"

"Big red nose?! Holy mackerel, that's Buggy and Alvida's ship! This is really bad!"

"Why?" asked Sanji. "We defeated them before, we can do it again."

"No, it's not that. It's just that I can't fight on a full stomach! I'm gonna get a cramp or throw up!"

Exasperated groans from the rest of the crew.

"Um, excuse me," interrupted Sakura. "But who are Buggy and Alvida?"

"Buggy and Alvida are other pirate captains," Chopper explained. "We've defeated them before, so that's why they're out to get us. They're especially dangerous now that they've teamed up, because they've also eaten devil fruit."

"Can they stretch too?" asked Naruto.

"No. Buggy can split himself into pieces like a jigsaw puzzle, and Alvida cannot be harmed by anything."

"How in the world are you supposed to defeat them?"

"Well," Nami said, "To defeat Buggy, you should tie each of his body parts to different places. Last time I just tied his body parts together, and so he kinda escaped." Sheepish smile. "For Alvida, you just have to tie her up and throw her in the water. We forgot to last time, so that's why she's still alive."

"Oh."

"Finally!" shouted Luffy. "I get to kick some butt. We've been sailing for weeks with nothing to do. Now we get some excitement."

Nami took out a bundle of small black sticks from underneath her skirt. She let them go, and they formed into one long stick.

"How's that going to protect you?" asked Sasuke incredulously.

"It can do other things too." Ussop came up behind him. "I designed it myself. You don't want to have it used on you."

Zolo had put on his bandana again, and stuck one of his swords' handles between his teeth. Holding the other two in his hands, he looked just about as scary as when Team 7 first saw him. Ussop took out a slingshot and a bag filled with eggs, stones, and other weird things. Apparently he was going to use that. Sanji and Chopper just stood there.

"What are they going to do?" asked Kakashi.

Chopper overheard. "Sanji can kick things – namely people - awfully well. And I – well, you're gonna have to wait three minutes." He took out a small black gumball and began chewing it. "In the meantime - chew,chew - you might as well tell me what you ninjas aregoing to do."

"Us?" asked Naruto. "Just watch me." He took out a kunai and threw it at Chopper's hat. It hit the center of the X.

"Hey, don't use this hat as a target!" rebuked Chopper huffily as Naruto came over to retrieve his weapon.

"Throwing little knives won't do anything against Buggy or Alvida," said Sanji. "You're gonna have to think of something else."

"Don't think we went through life fighting bad guys armed only with those," Sakura interceded. "We can do jutsu, too."

"Whatsa juice gonna do?" asked Luffy. "Besides giving us extra energy?"

"_Jutsu,_ not juice, you dopehead!" Zolo corrected.

"Whatever. Anyway, what is that?"

"What's jutsu?" Naruto exclaimed, surprised that Luffy didn't know what it was. "I'll show you. Watch."

"Naruto!" Kakashi yelled. "Don't squander your-"

Too late. "Art of the shadow doppelganger!" All of a sudden, fifteen more Narutos appeared out of nowhere.

"-chakra," Kakashi finished lamely.

"See? That's one jutsu. Hey, Sasuke! Show them your fire ball thing."

"Why should I? And, anyhow, I'm probably going to burn the whole ship up if I try."

"Hey, um, guys?" It was Sakura. "I think you might want to look at Chopper."

The formerly small reindeer had turned into a seemingly full grown one, with a human stature. "Still wondering how I'm supposed to fight?" he asked, revealing that though his body had changed, he still carried a tiny voice.

Naruto stared for a moment, then idiotically yelled, "Hey you! What did you do to Chopper?!"

"Um, hello, that _is _Chopper. Weren't you paying attention?" asked Ussop.

Suddenly, a cannonball splashed into the water in front of the ship. Buggy and Alvida were less than half a mile away. The battle was on!

5/21/2007


End file.
